• You look forward to having your fanny waxed because it’s a hour on your own
  • You feel like wearing a sign that says ‘the baby is being looked after’ when you are out without her
  • You return several supermarket trolleys for being banjaxed before you realise that’s just the difference between a trolley and a buggy
  • You fully believe that washing your hands with a baby wipe is perfectly acceptable
  • You realise half way through Gymboree that you haven’t brushed your teeth that day and spend the rest of the class trying not to open your mouth